"OUR 'THEORIES'":
Our "theories" about how Google ranks sites—i.e., "Google does this," "Google considers that"—reflect what we honestly believe to be true of Google's ranking methods.

We believe these "theories"—that Google relies mostly on external considerations (not a site's content, but who links to it)—are accurate even according to most pro-Google fanatics: "Requiring webmasters to market their sites makes it harder to rank well in Google, and hard is good."

Regardless of how many pro-Googlers validate our theories, in the context of this site they ARE still only our theories; we believe that no one outside Google can know for sure how the search engine works. Therefore, when we say "Google requires [this]," we mean simply: "According to what we have come to believe over time, Google requires [this]."

We have formed these theories over a period of roughly two years, during which time we have (1) meticulously studied the rankings of our own sites—many of which are the only sites for their topics—and (2) read more anti- and pro-Google opinions than sane people should. (Or "would," depending upon how sane you think we are for being neither pro- nor anti- and just telling the truth.)

"OUR ATTITUDES"; or, "BECAUSE MERELY STATING WHAT MANY PEOPLE ALREADY KNOW ISN'T VERY AMUSING"
The attitudes expressed within this website do not reflect attitudes we hold consistently over any significant period of time; they reflect how we feel when we see someone new to the web failing in Google and getting pounced on by an army of pro-Google fanatics who love the search engine only because everyone else does—thereby unknowingly, sadly mimicking Google's "Forget Content" methods—and whose favorite pastime is making themselves feel better by telling other people they suck.

Due to the various kinds of searches we perform, we find ALL of the major search engines—including Google—quite valuable. But we don't have Yahoo and MSN shoved down out throats 24 hours a day, and Yahoo and MSN are not annoying, misspelled mathematical terms that sound like baby-talk. That is what this website is about.

WE ARE ALL MORE CRITICAL OF (AND BRUTALLY HONEST ABOUT) PEOPLE, MOVIES, AND HOBBIES WE LOVE—NOT TO MENTION OUR OWN SELVES—THAN WE ARE OF AND ABOUT GOOGLE. GROW UP AND DON'T BE SO DAMN DEFENSIVE.

You didn't think that last sentence was ironic? Read more slowly.

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